Conservatives Win Worldwide As America Becomes More Popular

So much for the aching condition of our relationship with international allies, says I. Not only has the opinion of America world wide stopped its downward spiral, but pro-American politicians have been enjoying election victories around the world, most of whom are conservatives.

Angela Merkel, Chancellor of Germany, is on great terms with the United States and President Bush, and France recently elected an extremely pro-American president in Nicolas "Sarkozy the American". And the election of Silvio Berlusconi in Italy just days ago has driven the liberal elites in America and Europe absolutely mad. And we musn't forget the election of conservative Felipe Calderon in Mexico, either.

And, although not exactly conservative, British Prime Minister Gordon Brown recently heaped praise on President Bush, saying the world owes W "a huge debt of gratitude" for his leadership in the worldwide fight on terrorism.

Yes, my friends, the world is full of pro-American leaders in the very countries that were once the left's leading ammunition in their charge that nobody liked us. But the world's most vocal America haters were overthrown, first with Gerhard Schroeder in Germany, who won his second election by simply bashing America more than the other guy before finally losing to Merkel, and then in France, when the frogs rejected the failing socialist policies of rabid anti-American Jacques Chirac. Even Canada joined in the fun, electing Conservative Party Leader Stephen Harper as Prime Minister. And even though he beat out the staunchly pro-American John Howard, the new Australian Prime Minister, Kevin Rudd, was recently caught on video giving President Bush a friendly salute at a summit of worldwide leaders.

So, go ahead, my fellow Americans, and give yourself a hug! Everyone else is.